Sunday, July 18, 2010

In Which Innocent Jell-O Shots Are Spitefully Squandered . . .

We've been a little preoccupied with manuscript and such, so please bear with another week without jelly shot specific news and patter.  However, we thought you would be as delighted as we were to catch a reference to gelatinous cocktails via our beloved Dr. House.  As you can see from the episode excerpt below, the garrulously adorable (or obnoxiously abbrasive, depending on which side of the fence one sits on) Dr. House appears to be a fan of the Jell-O shot.  (We like to think he’d be a big proponent of Jelly Shots too. . .)

Scene, Wilson’s apartment.  Wilson enters.  House is ensconced on sofa, eating . . . 

H: late night with the pigeon sisters?

W: every now and again I’d like to come home without being interrogated

H:someone's cranky [thoughtful pause] . . . and late.

H:where were you

W:getting a drink

W [surveying kitchen]: . . .why are all my frozen dinners thawing on the counter?

H: I needed room for my margarita jello shots

[Wilson throws hands up in despair]

H:I used test tubes as bottles so they'll be shaped like my cane

H: Why'd you go out drinking alone?

[Wilson presses hands to face]

H: when you've got such great company here.

W: Tucker wants me to donate a lobe of my liver to him.

H: You were out drinking, so you're actually considering this?

W: Yeah, I was out marinating my liver in alcohol to get it ready for the transplant, yeah.

H: Your mouth says no but your pathetic attempt at a deflection has guilt written all over it.

W:  It's my fault.  It is my fault.  I gave him too much chemo.

H: You cured his cancer.

W: And killed him in the process.

H: Quibbles.

W:Laughing in disbelief.

H:He's had a predictable complication . . . Surprise bad things happen to people who are sick.  It doesn't make you responsible.

W:  Oh, not legally.  Ethically!  Ethically.

H: A table is a table . . . Don't be a doormat Wilson

W: Boy, you are an…you …. [pointing at frozen foods]  you willfully ruined my food and have taken over my living room because you already think I'm a doormat [opens fridge]  You know what…

[Wilson removes jello shots from refrigerator, dumps them loudly in garbage].  

W:  You're wrong.  [throws certain of House’s personal effects]  Clean up your stuff and get out.  You're wrong.

[Wilson storms out of apartment.  Slams door.  House stands silent, bewildered and horrified.  How could Wilson trash his Jell-O shots?  They were almost SET, for goodness sake . . . what a thoughtless waste of innocent Jell-O Shots.  The mayhem!  The humanity!]